Here's John Mayer's New Video...And a Continuation of My Plea

John Mayer premiered his video for "Shadow Days" today, and we're going to have to have another talk. LISTEN.  This song is nice.  It's a good "hey I know you thought I was a douche, but give me another chance" comeback song.  BUT THEN YOU GO ON AND LOOK THE WAY THAT YOU DO.

THIS IS NOT A LOOK.

WE TALKED ABOUT THIS.  Looking like you're going to murder people and then plant a cornfield over their bodies is NO WAY to start your comeback.  We need classic "Your Body Is a Wonderland" John.  We love that John.  

Because I am a fan until you really do murder someone (even then I'd prob still get excited to see how that effects your lyrics), I still love it.  I'm just saying that maybe, for the next video, cut the hair?  Maybe?  Please?

Appearances aside, I really do like the wanderer, trying to find yourself vibe of the video.  Well done! (ish)

Also, I'm told that you too were at 30 Rock's live episode, but that you were not there at the same time as me.  Rude, sir!  We could have been friends slash I would have pretended that I had no idea who you were and then you would have thought HOW REFRESHING and then you would have said hey let's go get drinks and I would have said mmm I mean sure?  And then we would have fallen in love.  But you were rude and got there at a different time and this scenario THAT I HAVE NOT HAD PLANNED OUT did not take place.  Le sigh.

John Mayer Cancels Tour, I Die On the Inside

John Mayer just posted on his Tumblr that all that throat stuff he took time off for just came back.  And now he can't sing.  Which means now I won't see him from the 10th row.  Which means I'm sad.  FOR HIM obv, FOR HIM.  This must be a rough time FOR HIM.

This is me at my last John Mayer concert:

So long ago!  (And kind of really nerdy, self!)

Wahh. He said that he's done singingly live indefinitely.

Track Listing for John Mayer's New Album

please, please, please get a new picture

Remember in that episode of Full House when Stephanie had a crush on a fellow baseball player, Bret, and DJ made fun of her by saying her heart beat went "Bret Bret, Bret Bret" instead of normal beat?

No?  Don't have a freaky specific knowledge of Full House?  You're telling me you DON'T remember when Stephane and Michelle spilt mustard on DJ's new sweater?  UGH. HOW RUDE.

I had a point.  Yes..right..so anywho my point was that with all this Johnny M. news lately my heart is beating just like Stephanie's was.  Which is why YOU'RE getting an overkill of album updates.  


Today he posted his track listing, something that serves absolutely no purpose but to think, "gee I bet 'Walt Grace’s Submarine Test, January 1967' is a whimsy song."


Here's the full track list for your guessing pleasure:

1. Queen of California
2. The Age of Worry
3. Shadow Days
4. Speak for Me
5. Something Like Olivia
6. Born and Raised
7. If I Ever Get Around To Living
8. Love is a Verb
9. Walt Grace’s Submarine Test, January 1967
10. Whisky, Whisky, Whisky
11. A Face To Call Home
12. Born and Raised (Reprise)

The album will be in your hands on 5/22/12

Update! John Mayer's Full Single

This is what happens when you report old news.  A few hours later they go ahead and release the full song.  It is lovely and amazing and soothing and perfect.  Don't worry, I'm not the least bit biased (at all).  He's released his tour dates and is coming NO WHERE near New York City soooo who wants to road trip?

Things That I Missed While On Vacation: John Mayer

Shit happened while I was away so this might be a weee bit dated.  However.  John Mayer was CRUEL and posted a snippet of his new song while I had zero computer access.  HOW COULD YOU.  If you haven't heard it yet, listen and melt.  I have this on loop while I'm doing all my catch up work.

 

Now let's talk single art.  Johnny, we've already have had this discussion about your new look.  We need it to stop, and we were prettyyyyyy sure that it did.  Mostly because someone angrily yelled at me that it did.  But looking at that picture, you still seem like Johnny Depp in Secret Window who is ready to kill us.  FIX. THIS.  It looks douchey and weird.  This is not the way to get everyone back on your side.  

I'm going to pretend we're not in a superficial world and the music will speak for itself because gawwwwd I already love it and can't wait for the album to come out.

I Get Hate Mail, And So Can You!

Apparently I've written some VERY controversial materials on here ol'blog.  I've gotten, we'll call it "corrections" via Tumblr.  So I've decided to answer their questions, it's seems the polite thing to do.

A few weeks back I wrote my plea to John Mayer to stop looking like a murdering Johnny Depp in Secret Window (spoiler alert!).  Innocent enough, seeing as I express my deep love for Johnny M., yet I received this.

Dear Anonymous,
Please find your identity.  I can only hope that you are right and he has changed his look.  CLEARLY he is original and one of a kind.  DUH.  I WANT MY PINK SHIRT BACK.

P.S.
I wish you weren't a coward and asked as anonymous because I feel we could have had a very interesting discussion.


Then yesterday I wrote a post on Lana Del Ray.  Not as nice, I'll give that to you, I merely stated that I'm not buying into to the new craze.  And maybe that she keeps her mouth open in a trout-like manner.  I got this:

Dear EastChapter, 

I am very sorry I have insulted your true love.  I am in no place to comment on her attractiveness.  She is very lucky to have a fan, such as yourself, who is willing to abandon their wealth and comfort for her.  I could only be so lucky as to have someone feel that way about me.  I am a fool to compare her to Keira Knightley, but I am happy you recognized her SNL performance was terrible.

This is fun.  So much so that a part of me hopes they keep coming.  I'm going to send this answer EastChapter, and hopefully they will be so kind as to give a response.  I'll keep you posted.

Velvet For My Ears: John Mayer Duets with Tony Bennett

Mashable has premiered the new video for Tony Bennett and John Mayer's duet, "One For My Baby."

Now, I am very biased when it comes to John Mayer but GAWD.  This is good shit.  Their voices work so well together that I'm going to pretend Johnny M. doesn't look like that.  It'll be hard, but I will pretend.

He better get his looks in line for his album release.  The perv-boy is gonna be a hard sell.

Click the picture to watch the video at Mashable.

Dear John Mayer,

Please stop looking like this.

No one is more excited than me that you're voice is better and that you're coming back and performing at SXSW.  But please don't come back as this guy.  I'll be embarrassed to be obsessed with this guy.  You look like a pervy Johnny Depp via Secret Window.  In fact the more I look at this picture, the more I'm certain you're going to murder me and use my body for corn fertilizer.  So please.  Come as this guy:

This guy has insanely smart lyrics that my friend Veronica and I nerdily obsess over.  I can't wait for your album to come out and I'll sure as hell see you on tour.  But please, not like this:

I'm gonna eat you.