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With that being said, I do not understand this "Stiletto Nail" trend. I have not seen any real person with them (by real I mean not a celebrity).
This fact has led me to have the following questions:
1. How do you put your contacts in?
2. How do you wipe yourself after you go to the bathroom? (that's right, I said it)
3. How do you not accidentally poke yourself and make yourself bleed while pulling up your pants?
4. Do you accidentally stab the person you share a bed with?
5. Does no one else realize that these look ridiculous?
The answers to these questions lead me to believe that only famous people have these nails:
1. Someone you pay puts them in
2. Someone you pay does it for you (ew)
3. Someone you pay pulls them up after wiping your butt (ew)
4. You do, but the person doesn't care because you're either their meal ticket or the other half to a dynamic duo (i.e. Beyonce)
5. Everyone you pay tells you they look awesome
Ridiculousness.
And now a picture of me and Steph where we DO NOT have Stiletto Nails.
i always look at people with those craycray nails and wonder how they function! it's the weirdest when they have children. do they not want to touch their own kids? don't their kids read bedtime stories about evil stepmothers and dragons having claws?
ReplyDeleteWell...I actually had stiletto nails and they are cute in person. Even my coworker thought they were cute. I did find it hard to function in the beginning, but it's like a new touch screen phone. You get used to it.
ReplyDelete1. How do you put your contacts in?
I don't own glasses. 20/20 vision.
2. How do you wipe yourself after you go to the bathroom? (that's right, I said it)
I didn't have a problem with this. Really. If you can't figure out how to wipe your ass and vagina with long nails, then I don't know...
3. How do you not accidentally poke yourself and make yourself bleed while pulling up your pants?
Only an idiot would have sharp stiletto nails. Mine had points that were dull and I didn't poke myself nor bleed. It made scratching so much easier.
4. Do you accidentally stab the person you share a bed with?
I don't sleep around. I share my king size bed with myself.
5. Does no one else realize that these look ridiculous?
Nope. Clearly you haven't seen them in person, so you wouldn't know.